He was SO adorable and YOUNG and Scottish, or so he said. Jeff had contacted me through Coffee Meets Bagel. He was obviously much younger than he said and very good looking and oh so appealing. I do love Outlander! And men in kilts! Oy. And he did call me “freaking hot.” Who could possibly be expected to resist that?
But I was oh so very cautious before giving him my cell number and of course asked for his name. I found him on LinkedIn and he accepted my connection request. On Facebook he goes by his name reversed, not always unusual, and sent me a friend request which I chose to ignore. He had a Twitter account and Instagram and all shared consistent information and photographs. Plus a website for his business.
Oh, he was a well-planned schemer; we had chatted online for weeks, before I was the one to finally ask him when would we finally meet.
I should have realized when he asked me questions like what’s your favorite color, season, flower, happiest childhood memory, etc that all was not kosher in Whoville. I asked if he was really a man and his answer was a “different type of man.” He had me then: hook, line, and sinker! That of course was, as I can clearly see now, when I should have known better!
Coffee meets Bagel (CMB) posted in our chat window: “We put this user on hold while we investigate to ensure that they are here to make meaningful connections.”
Of course Jeff had a pat answer for that: HE disconnected his account: “Too many messages from various women who I didn’t know if they were real or not. I think that I am done with dating sites for now”. He told me what I wanted to hear I guess!
Although I did email CMB to inquire the status of the investigation: Trust but verify!
I had made it clear, in an earlier chat just to be safe, that all my assets are tied up in investments. I guess, deep down I knew what he was really after. I was NOT totally delusional. I actually told him that I would NEVER give any man money!
His reply was “I don’t want anything to do with your money…I already have enough of my own.” Although he very “generously” offered to give me some investment advice in a great retirement vehicle: Bitcoin! Hey, we all know how that went. 😉
We continued to chat on a daily basis. We finally made a date to meet at a restaurant. Online he was very kind and thoughtful. He even read and “liked” my blog posts!! What could possibly go wrong?? And then a week before our date, he ghosted, totally disappeared and no longer responded to my texts.
Then, I received this message from CMB: “I’m so sorry about any confusion this message may have created for you. When you see this message, it means we put this specific user on hold while we investigate their account further. We will only send this message when we’ve received multiple reports from other members regarding this user. When we looked into this user’s account we noticed a few red flags that made us nervous this user was not legitimate and was soliciting money from our members. Please do not send this user any money or financial information. I would advise ending communication with this person if you are communicating outside of the app.”
It could have been a much unhappier ending to our “courtship.” And honestly I am not too disappointed since I am enjoying writing about online dating so much more than actually meeting guys, at least for now. With the “right” guy that could certainly change quickly.
***EDIT: I was astonished to discover a few days ago that Jeff is still following AND liking my blog. Wow! Is it possible that I really am funny? Or am I providing him with a road map into a woman’s psyche?
Jeffrey, if you read this: it is a very bad policy to stand up any woman with whom you have made a date. BUT doing so to a woman who blogs is a definite NONO!! A REALLY god-awful, bad plan: a woman scorned, etc, etc.
And we could have made such beautiful music together…on the bagpipes of course!